my heart hurts

I’m not even going to pretend not to be hurt by hardly any of our friends, or even our “friends”, planning to come to our Housewarming Party. I'm completely devastated. Maybe you have other, more important things to do. Or maybe you couldn’t get a sitter. Or maybe your car is out of sorts and you live out of town and you think your dog might get sick. Or maybe you just don’t want to. Whatever excuse you gave (some were justified of course, and I understand that!) or didn’t even bother to give, I don’t think you can call yourself a TRUE friend of ours if you can’t be there to celebrate our new home. And for some of you, not even acknowlege it!!! If you didn’t want to bring a gift but you thought we were expecting that, why couldn’t you talk to us about that? Or if you weren’t comfortable with that at least make up some other excuse. The majority of what we thought were GOOD friends didn’t even respond! If you think we are that shallow and greedy that we were just inviting people to get gifts then you probably aren’t friends with us anyway, or at least you shouldn't think you are. We actually are fortunate enough to not need anything for our house. And the things we do need, we would never expect someone to buy for us because they are expensive and it is, after all, our house. Therefore, our responsibility! We simply wanted to invite our friends and family over to our house to celebrate this huge accomplishment for us and to enjoy your company!
I don’t even know what the reason is for people just ignoring our invitation. Maybe we just don’t have the friends we thought. I’m sorry if this hurts people’s feelings or makes someone mad, but I’m mad! My feelings are VERY HURT!!!! And I’m so sick and tired of pretending not to be hurt so that I don’t upset someone else!!!!! I’ve been accused of complaining too much on Facebook. Well maybe I’m upset!!!! Did anyone ever think of that? Did anyone ever think enough of me to say “are you okay?”???? Yes, a few of you did and I greatly appreciate you!!! But to those of you who bitched about it or just deleted me altogether, you can’t call yourself a friend at all. I feel as if I am held to a different standard than others. I see MANY of you complaining or being rude or self-righteous or arrogant on Facebook and nobody says anything. In fact, you get applause or comfort or agreement with your feelings! Whereas I, on the other hand, seem to get ridiculed and judged for my feelings! I am no different than any of you! I have the same feelings and needs and wants! I feel hurt right now. I need friendships that I can count on! I want to feel loved and appreciated just like everyone else does!!! And maybe I complain about it, but by just blowing me off or ignoring me or even complaining about my complaints you make things worse for me by making me feel more alone and isolated. Right now, I feel as if I have no friends in the whole world! Maybe you think I’m just feeling sorry for myself or looking at the negative or complaining even more, but this is how I feel!!! I would think that those who truly care about me would be understanding, not judgmental! We reached out for help to paint our house and those of you who said “let me know if I can help” were nowhere to be found when the help was needed. I know that nobody wants to spend their Saturday painting someone else’s house, but we would do it for you!!! And for many of you, we have helped with things like this! We had several people that did step up and help us and we cannot tell them how much we appreciate it!!!! That’s part of why we wanted to have this party. To thank those of you who have been there for us through this process. We even invited those of you who let us down! I can see where you wouldn’t want to paint, but we’re offering food and fun at a party and you can’t show up for that???? I don’t even know how to deal with that.
The party is now cancelled so you are all off the hook. Thanks again to those of you that responded and wanted to be there! Please don't think you went unnoticed!!! We appreciate it more than you can know!
Hopefully, my true friends will read this with compassion and understanding. I cannot worry about how the rest of you feel anymore, I don't have the strength!